Why meditate? Why is there existence at all?

This post also appears on my substack here.

Science and religion both purport to answer the question: “why?”

Why do the tides rise and fall, like all the human lives on this earth?

Science: the interacting gravitational forces between the sun, the moon, and the ocean lead to the ocean’s changing distribution.

Then one might ask, why does gravity exist?

Science: gravity exists because mass warps the fabric of spacetime, leading to curvature in it that we perceive as gravity.

One might ask things like: why does spacetime warp and curve? Why do space and time exist at all?

Science: the big bang.

Why did the big bang happen?

Science: the big bang happened because it did.

Sounds a lot like the reasoning: “because God willed it.” And how did God and his will come to be? Well: God happened because he did. “I am that I am,” the Biblical God explains in Exodus.

Science attempts to explain the why of one phenomenon by expressing it in terms of other, more fundamental phenomena. You isolate a particular variable of reality. So the oceans and tides reduce to an expression of gravity. Gravity reduces to an expression of spacetime. Spacetime reduces to an expression of the big bang. The big bang reduces to an expression of… itself? Of reality? Of God?

You see, the “why” of things eventually reduces to the question of why things exist at all. Physics becomes metaphysics. Why is there is-ness? These are ultimately questions of existence and questions of creation.

In the end, science devolves into religion. Or rather, religion devolves into science.

The study of existence and creation has distinct tools and ways of knowing. They are, generally, contemplative practice and spiritual inquiry.

With these practices, you do not need to uncritically accept someone else’s words, especially mine, on the nature of existence.

You, in your own direct experience, exist. Nobody is closer to the stuff of existence than you are, right now, in this very moment, reading this, because this exists. This moment exists. This experience exists.

This is existence. This is existence. The nature of existence and creation is not only to be found in scripture, or treatises on ontology, or in altered states of consciousness. It is to be found right here. Existence is all that there is. All that there is is existence.

Another way of saying this: every experience you will ever have, including this one, is an expression of the big bang. Every single moment of your existence is an aftereffect of that original mystery. There is nothing you can possibly experience that is not tied up with that first cause. There is nothing that is not existence. There is nothing that is not (see footnote 1).

And so one way of studying God, or the nature of being, or the why behind all phenomena, is simply by studying your direct experience. The nature of God and the nature of this very moment are never separate. This is where the contemplative practices emphasizing observing reality with sensory clarity, like vipassana, come in. You learn to perceive your experience more clearly, more accurately, more vibrantly. What is the experience of heartbreak actually like? What is the freezing stuff of uncertainty and doubt actually, experientially, made of? How does the orange-ness of a California poppy actually appear to you, as an experience of vision? What are you? What is the nature of all this? These experiences all share in the nature of being, of eternity, of God being that he is.

Another way of gaining knowledge of existence is gaining knowledge of its forebear, creation. You study the nature of the thin veil between existence and non-existence. What is it like when you’re meditating on the breath and distraction comes into being? What is it like when remembrance (say, of the breath) comes into being? What is it like when you start a new creative project? What is the first moment of consciousness like upon waking? What is it like when a thought arises from silence? These all share in the nature of becoming, of birth, of the big bang, of God’s first word.

This knowledge is transferable. Knowledge has generalizable explanatory and predictive power. To completely understand the in-breath coming into being is to understand the universe coming into being. Which is also to understand God’s being. Which is to understand your own acts of creation, every time you start a new project or enter into a new relationship.

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Science, however, doesn’t end at why. Science is what enables technology, the “what can I do now that I know why?” Understanding the nature of the tides allows you to fish at more opportune times. It allows you to predict how much food you might be able to get and how long you need to make that food last.

What might be the benefit of understanding the nature of existence, of all that is, of creation itself? Why would you even meditate?

The answer to this lies in what technologies might arise out of such causal understanding of existence itself. Understanding the nature of the tides allows you some level of power with everything that the tides impact, like the amount of fish to eat. Understanding the nature of existence allows you some level of power with all that exists. I imagine such an understanding would make one very powerful. Indeed, there are many tales of shamans and yogis yielding quite extreme powers.

However, the most important wisdom and power gained from contemplative practice are less extreme and more direly necessary. Existential knowledge is required for addressing the existential risks we face today. On the macro, how might we delay mass extinction events, including human extinction? On the micro, how might I construct my own life such that I experience it as meaningfully fulfilling its existential possibilities?

Knowledge of the nature of creation is necessary for seemingly simple questions of creation, such as: how do I create relationships in my life that are fulfilling and mutually enriching? How do we create a human society that isn’t bound by short-sighted cycles of exploitation and extraction which eventually leads to exhaustion and collapse? How might you partake in the creation of your own life? How might we partake in the creation of our shared world?

The great question of science and religion is why. And the great answers that arise out of this always include what’s next? What’s next for me and for you? What’s next for us and our planet? Where next will the tides of our lives go?

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If you’re interested in applying these ideas to your own life or discussing them further, I’m always happy to talk. I offer meditation coaching here.

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1 Credit to Sarah Mergen, who coined this in her wonderful podcast Katabasis/Anabasis.

2 Poetic accompaniment to this essay is “The Snow Man” by Wallace Stevens.